7 Myths About Creating A Better Relationship

Here are 7 of the most common misconceptions my clients have related to me about having a better relationship. These misconceptions are followed by my perspective on each one of them.

Myth 1 I have to love everything about my partner

Reality Check 1

You were born pure and pristine. You then learnt behaviors from your parents, teacher, coaches, church etc. (who did their best to teach you about a better relationship). These behaviors have become the backbone for your way of living and having a better relationship.

Perhaps a common behavior that irritates having a better relationship would be leaving the toilet seat up after use. This is merely a behavior and not the essence of the person. However, when you may consider this behavior to be the person, this destroys the concept of a better relationship, creating all kinds of conflict in your need for a better relationship.

Myth 2 Love means that I can fix your partner

Reality Check 2

You met your partner because of some special quality or charteristic that you admired. You need to accept and allow that quality to flourish in order to allow you and your partner to grow into a better relationship.

You may be unaware that you do not even like yourself. Yet by allowing your partner to grow and expand, you will experience the quality of your partner and the beauty within you, as you begin to enjoy a better relationship.

Myth 3

I am supposed to give up the things I like in order to be in a better relationship.

Reality Check 3

Giving up the things you like to be in a better relationship is like take a knife and cutting away a part of yourself.

Your better relationship is based on the uniqueness of you and your partner.

When you give up your uniqueness you rob yourself of a better relationship, your passion and your partner of your creativity.

Myth 4 I will be rescued by a knight in shining armour

Reality Check 4

You may have been conditioned to live your life expecting someone to take care of you. What happens if that person becomes ill? and is no longer able to take care of you.

Your responsibility in creating a better relationship, is to bring your passion to the table of your relationship. Some days you will be the knight in shining armour and another day your partner will be the knight in shining armour of a better relationship.

You will each get a chance to shine like star in a better relationship because of your strengths and weaknesses.

Myth 5 It cost a lot to be in a relationship

Reality Check 5

In a material context, a better relationship can be expensive if you think that love is based on the bigger house, car or boat. Although some of these material assets are necessary, they should not be at the expense of creating a better relationship.

Love is creating a better relationship by building a relationship that is based on the simple things in life, like walking and holding hands, going on a picnic (just the two of you), or sharing an ice cream.

Love in a better relationship is not about what you show on the outside but what you express in you heart. Love is not about money or materialism, love just is.

Myth 6 Love in a relationship is or is not a feeling

Reality Check 6

It is not what you say, it is what you do. You can say, "I love you" which may be merely words and no feelings (action). Love is the action of doing.

If you make a cup of tea for yourself, (the water is boiled), make a cup of tea for your partner. Whether your partner wants the tea or not is irrelevant, it is the thought that counts and the action that cements a better relationship.

Myth 7 I don't have to work at my relationship

Reality Check 7

As a child, you learned to creep before you walked. Then you learned the letters of the alphabet. In order to write, you had to learn how to put those letters together to make words and sentences.

These sentences then become the way in which you communicated.

When you and your partner stop communicating after learning how to use the letters of the alphabet in sentences, it's like 2 tape recorders talking to each other - Nobody is at home to enjoy a better relationship.

In summary:

1. Your partner's behavior in a better relationship is not your partner's true essence.

2. There is no need to have a clone of yourself. A better relationship requires some variety.

3. Giving up of your uniqueness to be in a better relationship is like throwing out the baby with the bath water.

4. In a better relationship there are no superior partners, just equal partners.

5. Love in creating a better relationship is not about money and the material assets (although there are important) but the simple things in life.

6. Love in a better relationship is active not passive.

7. Lack of communication crushes your desire for a better relationship.



Dale
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Wise Tale Food Tales

Through out the years we have heard so many myths about certain foods. I have done some research to try and dispel some of these rumors. By no means am I an expert when it comes to food but the information does come from the experts. Being married twenty years and having a big family I do consider my self some what of an expert when it comes to eating healthy.

1. Eggs. For years we have heard how bad eggs are for you. This is true if you eat a dozen a day but personally I haven’t met a single person yet that eats that many eggs. We here about cholesterol and fat but in actuality eaten properly eggs are full of vitamins that are actually good for you.

2. Wine We always here that a glass of wine everyday is good for you. This may be true as long as its only one glass and you are drinking it while eating healthy. A glass of wine won’t do a thing for you if you eat three hamburgers and fries everyday. Another thing is getting dependant on the wine could turn into a disastrous thing as well.

3. Butter or Margarine In reality neither one is good for you if consumed in large quantities. They are both full of fat and processed ingredients. Butter and margarine are almost identical in fats and calories. So once again as long as they are consumed in moderate quantities neither will harm you.

4. Fresh to frozen For the most part if you compare apples to apples then nutrient values are very close to the same. Fresh carrots compared to frozen carrots. The frozen may lack a little in taste but they are almost equal in nutrient value. Where the difference comes in is when you compare fresh carrots to frozen carrots mixed with a cream sauce. So in reality if you’re on a budget frozen foods are usually a little cheaper so don’t worry your not sacrificing your family’s health.

5. Carbs Will you gain weight eating carbs? Of course you will. Carbs are no different then eating any other foods. The key to everything is to eat in moderation. If you eat a loaf of bread with your breakfast then you best be prepared to watch the weight gain.

These are only a few myths in a world filled with them. In my experience getting help with weight loss is a good idea but the trick is to make sure you use the help whether it is a diet, certain foods, pills or supplements. I noticed the best thing for my diet was some supplement pills, eating in moderation and drinking lots of water.

Dale Mazurek

Dale has been married for twenty years and considers himself somewhat of an expert when it comes to topics to do with weight control. You can check out his ever growing relationship blog at http://relationshiptidbits.blogspot.com/ two more of his very popular blogs can be found at http://fishingtutor.blogspot.com/ and http://affiliatemarketingfornewbies.blogspot.com/